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Welcome to my blog!

I am Buffy, I live in Iowa with my kitty cat Meowshine and stay rather busy trying to be healthy, eating right, working out, working my full-time job and running my own custom jewelry business on the side. Thanks for coming along for the ride :)



Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Listen to yourself

I was talking to a coworker today on how important it is to trust yourself. To listen to that inner voice telling you what is right for you, not listening to what everyone else says you should be doing. She had sent me a blog about a girl who was 25 and not feeling like she fit into what society said she should be doing at 25. She talked about being open to what is out there and doing what is best for you, not what you think you should be doing. I can certainly empathize. Most people my age are married, with kids, paying a mortgage and in a stable job that’s been progressing since they graduated from college (aka making more money). They have their life figured out. Ok that is what it seems to the outside world but I have begun to learn they often do not. And I suppose that is where a big problem arises when you compare your life to others. You don’t know the inside like they do. You can’t see why they have made the decisions they have and if they are truly happy. I would much rather be happy then suffocating in a life that from the outside fits the rest of the worlds mold of a 31 year old female. Now for someone who is always concerned about doing the right thing, doing what I should be doing (I blame it being raised by a correctional officer)…this was a really hard pill to swallow. After my divorce and feeling like a failure at life, I struggled with who I was and what I meant to the world. What was my value now? I soon realized that who I was had so little to do with my relationship status and I started to reevaluate the things that were really important to me. I could finally ask myself what I wanted out of life, not just what I felt was expected of me. It was such an exhilarating (and scary) time and I was really happy I could honestly look at myself and my life and what my inner voice was telling me. In the time that has passed, I can’t tell you how many ups and downs I had. There were times I had no idea where I was going and felt so lost. But then there was other times that I could feel that I was in the right place in my life. I suppose it is never 100% but you have to trust yourself and let it guide you hoping for the best. The parts of my self that I have embraced since then have always been the core of who I was but I really hadn’t let those parts guide me before. Now that I have, my life is in such a better place then it ever was. And I know they are going to lead me to even better places. My life is mine and I am proud of myself for continuing to grow even now. To get the best life we can, we have to be willing to take risks, we have to listen to that inner voice telling us what is important and right for us. You might not fit into what society expects of you but you know what? That’s ok. We are all different and we are all supposed to take different paths in life. I’m not ashamed where my path has taken me and you shouldn’t be either. As long as you are growing and reaching for your dreams, how can you be mad at that? Found this on pinterest...

4 comments:

  1. Comparing your inner life to everyone else's outer life is always a losing proposition because we like to show our best side to the world. I'm pretty sure everyone is about equally messed up.

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    1. I totally agree. It's a recipe for disaster and not fair to do to yourself. I think we all have pieces that feel so broken and messed up. No one is perfect (no matter how it seems on the outside) and I think it would be really boring if we were

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  2. Society's expectation? Pssht, take a look at how our society has dipped it's toe into no values, manners or empathy. (Or maybe its dove in head first?) Then it wants to dictate where people should be in their lives?? I think not! Everyone wants to look like they have the perfect life and I guarantee most do not. This girl and everyone else needs to live up to their OWN expectations of themselves. You're the one that has to live your life and as long as you (and the person you might share it with) are happy, that's all that matters. :)

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    1. Ha ha, right?! She's 24 so I'm hoping I saved her some heartache and time by letting her in on our secret :)
      When you let go of who you think you should be and let yourself be who you actually are, it's an amazing transformation. And the happiest you can find when you embrace that is totally worth it

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